EMBRACING BLACK AND THE REST OF THE COLOUR

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“EMBRACING BLACK AND THE REST OF THE COLOURS”

STUPID GIRLS

Friday, May 25, 2012 || 5:23 AM

WARNING :

This post is very much like a rant .

Not a rant , just like a rant .

The author is not responsible if you 'terasa" .

AUTHOR"S NOTE :

I am fully responsible to what I shall say .

Heck yea ;)

Boungiorno folks :)

I am proud to present

my first post since I entered college .

So once again ,

This is an insecurity inspired post .

Shameless promotion starts here :

I wrote a post for girls months ago , so here it is ,

If you wanna take a look :)

http://illtellyouwhenifigureitout.blogspot.com/2012/04/feminime-beings.html

You may return to your normal lives now .

Lemme tell you folks ,

college in the city is not the best place

for " kampung " girls like me to go to .

Lets begin shall we ?

Allow me to share with you ,

the two main things I learnt when I first entered HELP .

1. Fashion Sense

Quoting mah bro Edward ,

" College is like a fashion show "

I understand this is Kuala Lumpur , its a big city and all ,

but come on ,

you are in an educational institution la weyh .

Nobody gives a damn if you are wearing Versace ,

or that shirt you wear at the Pasar Malam yesterday .

But most importantly ,

Dear ladies :

I admit , sometimes I am confused to whether you are wearing clothes or not .

I do believe your micro mini shorts/ skirt are visible ,

but only with the aid of an electron microscope .

And don't be complaining when it gets cold ,

You are the one who took a decision to wear so minimally ;)

On the upper hand ,

You are giving the boys a real good treat !

So yea , congratulations child .

You succeeded in getting the attention you wanted .

2. Cliques .

I am from Convent , an all girls school,

and its filled with cliques .

But I got out of mine and never went back .

Indeed , when I came to college ,

I still stayed clear of all things clique .

There is one clique in particular that I am aware of .

I had the unfortunate opportunity of sitting in between them the other day ,

and I remember whatsapp-ing Joshua ,

" I am cosplaying as a rock currently" .

Hasn't High School Musical taught us well , to defy the status quo ?

What is about cliques

that makes one oblivious and ignorant toward others ?

I get it that its cool to hang with people who are similar to you .

However ,

please be aware of the existence of others for goodness sake .

Ignorance is not bliss .

Sorry I am not pretty enough to hang with you guys .

Might I add , I ~~puke at~~ admire how all of you can camwhore ,

in every single class .

I apoligize ,

I just had to let it out .

Please excuse my teenage need to be petty and superficial .

I am not always this mean ,

but my tolerance limit has long been exceeded .

I admit , when I first entered the college ,

before I met mah bros ,

I felt a need to be like these girls .

Insecurity has been a constant part of my college life so far .

But insecurity will never get total control over me ,

cause I will never , ever let myself ,

be like them stupid girls .

I shall end this very brief post with a poem I wrote ,

inspired by stupid girls .

Title : Stupid Girls

Stupid girl, stupid girls, stupid girls
Maybe if I act like that, that guy will call me back
Porno Paparazzi girl, I don't wanna be a stupid girl

Go to Fred Segal, you'll find them there
Laughing loud so all the little people stare
Looking for a daddy to pay for the champagne
What happened to the dreams of a girl president
She's dancing in the video next to 50 Cent
They travel in packs of two or three
With their itsy bitsy doggies and their teeny-weeny tees
Where, oh where, have the smart people gone?
Oh where, oh where could they be?

Disease's growing, it's epidemic
I'm scared that there ain't a cure
The world believes it and I'm going crazy
I cannot take any more
I'm so glad that I'll never fit in
That will never be me
Outcasts and girls with ambition
That's what I wanna see
Disasters all around
World despaired
Their only concern
Will they **** up my hair

Maybe if I act like that, that guy will call me back
Porno Paparazzi girl, I don't wanna be a stupid girl
Baby if I act like that, flipping my blond hair back
Push up my bra like that, I don't wanna be a stupid girl

So umm yea ,

The End .

I lied .

Its the lyrics from P!nk's Stupid Girls song .

A song that always makes me feel good about myself .

I may not be one of those pretty girls ,

but I have a BIG ambition and a BIG dream .

I am not a stupid girl ,

and never will be .

I will get back to writing educational PSA's soon.

For now , Ciao folks .

Note to self :

Believe in thy beauty .

The End .

FEARS AND FRUSTRATIONS GALORE

Tuesday, April 17, 2012 || 6:02 AM

-FACT-

This is not an amusing post .

Proceed at your own risk .

Hello folks :)

This post is for all those with deep fears and secrets .

Which basically is most , if not all of you .

If you are willing to listen ,
do read on .

This is Sean Tolke .

So , Sean just went of his meds

right after he and his baby momma had a miscarriage .

And the miscarriage woman has left him .

He said to Cathy , his sister ,

" I want to be able to feel all the pain that I am going through .

So I stopped taking the meds "

By the end of the episode ,
Cathy is seen opening his house door and looking shocked .
And BAM , the credits roll .
I assumed he had hung himself .

This is Lee .
He has cancer just like Cathy and was in the same trial with her .
Cathy arrives at Lee's house ,
and sees the guy slowly dying away .
He does not want to go to the hospital or anything .
Just to die with peace , there with his friend
He accepted death he said .
He whispered to Cathy ,
"Today is a depressing day aint it ?
But tomorrow would be a brighter one "
And he died .

These two men may be characters from the show , The Big C ,
but I relate heavily with these two .
Why ?
Cause they represent my biggest fears .
And I am writing this as a self therapy to get over the trauma .

Fear Numero One : Losing sanity .

I am not talking about going senile at my old age .
I mean , having an actual mental illness during present times ,
where you have to be locked up at an asylum .
Not knowing or remembering anything you have experienced before .
Not recognizing the souls you once held dear to you .
Complete loss of reality .
No hope .

Here is my secret .
I have a sincere belief that I will go insane one day .
And I mean that , like serious shit , I mean that .
I am aware I have this pent up mental illness inside of me somewhere .
And yes , this is why I wanna learn Psychology .
So that I can treat myself .
That is the most accurate reason to why I wanna learn Psychology .
Sounds selfish , I know .
It is what it is .

Sean Tolke represents this fear .

Fear Numero Dos : Dying young .

Lovely lovely short film , I tell you .

This fear is related to the first one .
Death to me is not just physical death ,
as in soul leaving body kind of death .
But also the complete loss of every essence that was you .
When I do go senile ,
I am not gonna be Roshinee anymore .
That is also dying young .

I also think that I might contract a terminal disease ,
like cancer or something .
But I prefer a terminal disease compared to losing sanity .
In the words of Morrie from the Tuesday's With Morrie by Mitch Albom ,
who suffered ALS :
" I am lucky . Not everyone is lucky to be given the time to say goodbye like me "
When I was 14 , I told myself ,
if I did get any of these terminal illness
it would give me a reason to get out of the house ,
and do what I want before my time runs out .
And I still hang on to those words .

Blessing in disguise , it is .

Lee represents this fear .

Fear Numero Tres : Unrequited Dream / Love .

Even this interconnects with the two above .
When I do go insane and/or die young ,
What would happen to my dreams ?
All the efforts I have put ,
Those that my family put into me ,
Only to fall into such a tragic end .

What if I had fallen in love with someone ?
If I ever do fall in love ,
I would feel so guilty to have disappointed him .
But mostly upset for leaving him so tragically .
But you know what ,
my fear of never finding the one is even worse .
Dying is one thing .
Dying alone is another .

Heck I even sent in a PostSecret admitting that .
With the picture above .
What I wrote was classified though .

Soooooooooooo YES .
There you go .
These are my three main fears ,
and all three are interconnected to each other .
And I made them like my own self prophecy .
We all have secrets , and I presented mine .
Some of you are like ,
" WTF is wrong with this emo biatch ? "
Or " Screw this shit "

I know , sorry for the solemn post .
( NOT )
But I wanted to let out my fear anxiety after watching the show .

I shall end this post ,
with a PostSecret I found three years ago .

Okay la , to compensate for the very EMO vibe ,
here is a a 9gag post to cheer you up :)
Cause I am cool like that .

I just had to make fun of twilight .
I just had too .

I shall live positive as long as I could .
But the future is surprising that way eyh ?

We all have dirty little secrets .
This is mine .

The End .

FEMINIME BEINGS

Friday, April 6, 2012 || 4:36 AM

-WARNING-

This blog is about girls .

But dear boys , don't run away just yet .

You might learn a thing or two ;)
Also the spacing on my blogs is busted ,
so bear with it , thank you .

-ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS-
I dedicate this post to the Son of Radhakrishna .
Who said I am a guy .

Bongiourno tutti !

Google Translate it , that's Italian for wassup everyone !

Lets jump into the water straight away shall we ?

Insert flashback here .

I am from Convent , an all girls school ,

Being a LADY is pushed upon us involuntarily .

But that was too mainstream for me .

So I rebelled la .

You shall now return back into present time .

The idea of wanting to be
a sweet vulnerable feminine being came to mind

When I watched this video in Dec 2010

A Beautiful Mess by Jason Mraz .

Then Yuna strolled into my life and BAMMM
I wanted to be like her , a lady .

Anyways , forgive my temporary narcissism ,
Just establishing the background story for the topic .

So yes FEMINIME .

Imagine a room filled with girls right now .

In the corner , there she is .
The one with the sweetest dress ,
And what great legs she has .
A face perfectly applied with make up ,
With a head of flawless long hair ,
The one boys go gaga over saying she has the looks of an angel .
Did I mention she is soft spoken ,
and giggles a lot too ?

Opposite her .
Silently dancing away with her headphones
Despite the stares and laughs from the rest .
She only owns a pair of good jeans and that is that .
The term " sexy " is not even within her vocabulary .

Screw what the world thinks of her .

She is what others describe as , " Mehhh "

In most cases when we think girls ,
we usually imagine the first girl .
But they are both girls right ?

They seem a world away , it does not even compute anymore .
This is the feminime stereotype of a girl .

I asked my male homosapien friend to give me his take on this topic ,

From a male's point of view .

The word feminine

from my understanding is what girls should be and all

I mean, as girls

dress up like one, behave and act like one

but it all doesnt really matter

she doesnt have to be feminine to portray herself as a girl

if shes willing to step out of her comfort zone and be different from the rest 

then why not

I further asked him , would guys fall for such girls ?

I mean, if shes expressing herself for who she really is

then i guess as society, it's only right to accept them for who they are

not for who they are trying to be

so it really depends on how that guy would see her

for who she really is and wants to be

hmm question answered?

Yes Mr Samuel Skyline , and thank you :)

You the MAN for being cool to answer that .

My female friend Kanwal answered as well ,
what is a feminine woman ?

Courage, strength, embracing her flaws, and accepting her true self.
Because by possessing all that,
she carries herself with the grace
one can only associate with pure femininity.

Spoken like a true lady la she :)

There are so many girls out there that are like me ,
that just can't stand being in skirts and heels .
Its not that we don't want to be pretty ,
we simply don't care or we don't know how to .
In my case , I don't know how to .
And I don't own a skirt , so yea .
We just like playing and goofing out ,
It just can't be helped .

But I admit ,
I wanna be like really feminime too .
Every girl wants to be dolled up and pampered ,

feel like she is the prettiest one of them all .
The combination of nice , sweets , unicorns , sugar , and lace .
Minus Chemical X .
( That is a Power Puff Girl Reference BTW )
I want to be feminine .
I wanna be her if I could , I do .

But I am not gonna beat myself up if I can't .
( And I know I can't )

There is no need to hate yourself ,
saying you are soooo ugly on Facebook ,
Not only does it make you look like a desperate attention whore ,
you are also depriving your own self confidence .

You gotta understand ,
Feminime is a very subjective term .
Feminimity DIFFERS .
Don't push yourself towards it .
You are who you are ,
and there is no point in pretending to be so feminine
if that is not who you are .

As cheesy as it sounds ,
Be yourself la ,
Whoever that may be .

Embrace flaws ,
And recognize you are beautiful soul .
You are who you are .
That goes for girls and guys alike .

And oh yea ,

a note for the guys reading this .

Cough Kishen Cough Radhakrishna Cough

Never ever tell a girl ,

" You right ,look like this guy I know blah blah blah "

or worse ,

"You guy right ? "

followed by a cheeky smile .

No la wei , I keeeeeeed .
Kita main main je la kan Kishen ?
HAHAHAHAHA

But really , listen boys ,
If you are gonna say that to a girl,
and challenge her progesterones ,
Proceed with caution and at your own risk .

So yes , Good Friday to all those that are celebrating it btw :)

Embrace , Accept , and Live Your Life .

The End la .

THE ZONES

Sunday, April 1, 2012 || 10:52 PM

-AUTHOR'S NOTE-

Happy Post April Fool ;D

Namaste to you .

Its been a while since I wrote an " educational " post .

So here it is folks .

This time around I want to do a PSA .

A Public Service Announcement for long .

Hunger , Poverty , Famine , Economic Meltdown , Bieber's Boyfriend Song

are currently mainstream world issues .

But there is one issue that is not being addressed as it should be .

And it has been affecting us for ages , unknowingly

But now , It has a name .

I present to you , The Zones .

Our class shall commence now .

Feel free to take out your non existent pencils and start taking mental notes .

If there is a trophy for the most widespread zone ,

that would be the Friend Zone .

Derived from Friendzone ,

comes Guy Zoned , Bro Zoned , Gay Zoned , Pizza Zoned and etc .

Friend Zone 101

A video for those who prefer to be visually enticed :

Usually attacks males in their teen years who are best friends with a girl ,

whom they have secret affections for a long time ,

but are scared to tell her out of fear of ruining the friendship .

But when they finally have the guts to admit it to her ,

she would automatically say ,

" Geee . I do like you a lot but not in that way .

I think we should just stay friends "

In most cases ,

though the male best friend is a really nice guy ,

and is willing to do anything for the girl .

She would end up liking some other ~~douche of a~~ guy .

And that my students ,

is the dilemma of the Friend Zoned victims .

It has long been told ,

that once in you are in the Friend Zone ,

There is no escape .

Are we girls really that oblivious ?

Does Nigahiga 's video have an ounce of truth to it ?

Do nice guys always finish last ?

Are vampires real ?

Will I stop asking questions ?

Though I have never experienced Friend Zone before ,

I am aware of a few that have .

And so this is my message to the world out there .

To the guy being friend zoned ,

Keep fighting for her , bro .

She must be really special if you are willing to stay in the zone for her .

But if she is forever blind to what you can offer ,

Then maybe its time to move on to someone who can :)

You the MAN , and yea , you are worthy of someone too , you know ?

Give your testosterone a break of pride la wei .

Have a break , Have a Kit Kat .

To the girls who are unaware that they are friend zoning ,

You may be thinking I don't do that ,

but girl , open your eyes and look at your male BFF for once .

Are you unconsciously BLIND to his affections and niceness for you ?

Ponder upon it for a moment , will you ?

And now students ,

I present to you another Zone before calling it a blog day .

Something for the ladies this time ;)

She is just a typical girl , like everybody else .

She is not that into silly girly stuffs

but she is a girl , she has an uterus and all .

She is more comfortable hanging out with the boys ,

And they find her cool to hang around with too .

They even bro fist and everything .

The boys tell her ,

" The guy that would end up with you is gonna be so lucky "

But they would never consider her girlfriend material .

Why ?

Cause they say , she is ONE OF THE GUYS .

That my children , is Guy Zoned .

So even though she likes the guy a lot ,

She is always labelled as one of the guys .

And guys have bromance , they can't date one of their guys .

Bro Zoned is like the higher level of Guy Zone .

Where the girl is like a brother to the guy whom she likes .

Its cool , unless she actually likes the guy romantically .

I can honestly say ,

Yes I have experienced Guy Zone . I am undergoing it .

So if you too are being guy zoned like me :

I hope I have educated you well

on the symptoms and dangers of The Zones .

I officially dismiss the class .

You are now graduates with a Diploma of Zones .

Congratulations :)

Your mother would be so proud of you .

But no la folks ,

It actually doesn't matter if you are romantically attached or not .

As long as you are happy with yourself ,

That is all that matter .

Learn to love yourself ,

then you can love others as well aite :)

And NO , you will never be like this forever .

But momentarily , perhaps :P

Hope exists for those who believe :)

The End .